I'm a costume designer, makeup artist, teacher, mom, knitter, baker, want-to-learn-how-to-do-it-all

My photo
I'm a costume designer, makeup artist, teacher, mom, sewer, knitter, baker, want-to-learn-how-to-do-it-all, blogging, Costumed Beagle enthusiast. I am not always pleasant, although through intensive cupcake therapy I have learned not to throw knives at people anymore.

Sunday, September 2, 2012

La's Fall Fashion Forecast

Fall is just around the corner and I thought I'd use this as an excuse to air a few of my least favorite fashions.  Or NOT fashions as the case may be.  Fashion seems to be something that is good and worthy and somewhat thoughtful if not always practical, while the things I'm about to show you seem to lack all of those things.

First a little fashion trend I am seeing entirely too much of: The bag.



No one should wear this, EVER.  Ever heard the saying "put a bag over that"...well that's exactly what it will look like someone tried to do to you if you wear this.  I don't care how much glitter and rhinestones you throw on it--it is still a bag.

Here's the cut out shoulder version.  Not good people.
Not good.











Then there's the 80's throw back to Flashdance.
If you are not a 95 pound dancer with size AA breasts and a sassy afro, you cannot pull off this look.  Your bag's head hole accidentally got too big and you missed with one of your arms.



Then there is footwear.  I know millions of Americans wear these, but it doesn't make it right.  Anna recently found a glittery pink pair while back-to-school shopping and longingly pulled them off the shelf.  Before I could say anything, she thrust them back muttering to herself  "Mom will NEVER let you wear those."  That's right.  And Why?  "They are an abomination and she loves me too much to let me do that to my feet."




Now for hair.  I am a bit lazy in the hair department and am always keen to find a new do that requires less work than the last but that doesn't quite let me lapse into the category of people who shouldn't even be allowed to have hair....but this is too much.  Abnormally shaped noggins are not good.  What will alien life-forms think about our brain development if they see this??











And lastly sleepwear.  Quite frankly you can wear whatever you want to bed.  Well...truthfully you can wear whatever you want whenever you want regardless of what I think about it, but adult sized footy pajamas kind of creep me out.  I get that you want to be warm and the fuzzy polyester stuff they make those out of is really soft and comfy...but one has to draw a line, and if my house were to burn down and I were forced into the street on a cold night you would not see me wearing this.  It feels like it belongs in some sort of weird porno.



So there you have it: La's What NOT to wear this fall.  As for what you should wear, well...dress the part, I always say.











6 comments:

  1. I'd like to claim some small inspiration for this post. Not that I've made these faux pas, but that I complained about the bag first. I LOVE this blog!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes...and then I kept seeing more things I could't ignore it anymore. I thought to myself "the world needs to know what I think about this!"

      Delete
  2. I gotta disagree with you on one point: I've always wished for adult sized footie pajamas. But I do concede that I'm also a girl who still collects all things Winnie the Pooh. And that I have this perverse need to be a little bit different, especially when it's very unlikely that anyone will even notice.
    My mom recently bought some crocs, but not to worry -- they're some nice croc brand flats that are actually pretty cute. I never would have guessed they were made by the same people. And she did it for a reason -- she has developed MCS (multiple chemical sensitivity) and all shoes with anything even close to leather or something decent is causing all sorts of reactions and pain in her feet. So she figured crocs would be the the very fakest of the fake. Yay for shoes she can actually wear!
    As for the bag... I'd look like I was wearing a Halloween costume and masquerading as a sack of potatoes. Or maybe watermelons. It wouldn't be pretty.
    Rest assured that I will never intentionally make my hair stand up with any more "body" than it already has. Any brain reshaping appearance is simply due to bedhead. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are exceptions to everything...although perhaps you should keep your penchant for footy jammies to yourself....

      Delete
  3. Hey! I think I found your blog on a Google search one time...I sew, I make costumes, it was inevitable. Sometimes I am really bad at following blogs, though :0( So today I just went through a whole bunch of your posts. This one made me laugh out loud, literally.
    But what was even funnier, there was an add for buying crocs on line the first time I clicked on comments. Gotta love technology!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is Fantastic. That made my day.
      Please market crocs on my blog....
      Welcome. I'm afraid I'm a bit random with both content and schedule.

      Delete